that`s exactly how i feel right now. aft a tiring day of the full dress rehearsal w the children im totally worn out. its worse than bringing them to the zoo. fwahhhh. anyway met aggy for dinner aft work. the drizzle din help at all. hate walking ard w my toes / feet wet. hate that feeling. but i love rainy days. been wearing my crocs day in day out so that my other footwear wont turn smelly / soiled / spoiled due to the unpredictable weather.
and so aft dinner and a lil walks. ended up at void deck w a cuppa and just chilled and talk`d abt everything. no idea why did childhood came in and we recalled abt the different funny moments when we were young and had a great time. at least i had. and that talk make me realise how pure innocent worry free we used to be. and most importantly easily contented and happiness can be found easily and its almost within a hand`s reach. it could be as simple as a ice cream otw home from school or a barbie doll.
deep down i really wanna go back to the days where everything was so carefree. and all of a sudden i miss my grandpa manyaplenty. often i wonder how different life wld be if he is still ard. would i be over at gramps more often? i miss seeing him sitting at the veranda w his paper. i miss running to him and ask for a lil spare shillings for tidbits down the block. i miss calling him ah gong. i really regret not having more time to spend w him. im just too young to understand all this. i think at least he has happy memories of me running ard the house. i`ll look at the photos time to time and just miss him a whole load. near 21 years of my life and its filled w plenty of beautiful and heart wrenching memories. there are plenty which i dont ever want to lose but one of them would def be the days i spent w him. i would really love to have another 24 hours next to him once again. but wishes like this dont come true. i dont have a fairy godmother i dont have a genie nor time machine. i can only hold the memory close to my heart and silently wonder abt all the what ifs.
alright. this shit is getting too emo alr. im gonna slp and prepare for another battle of the wits w the children once again. (: the sun shined at 12:58 AM
